OH NO YOU DIDN’T SCARY MOMMY BLOG!
So, you say, “The adults who get to leave home each morning and go work with other adults who don’t shit their own pants and cry on twelve-minute intervals have no idea how easy they have it.” Is that right? You said easy!?!?
I CHALLENGE you to take on, not only the job of caring for your children every day, but getting up extra early to make sure they have everything they need to shuttle them off. Then frantically rush to your JOB that pays money so your family can have all those life necessities, and luxuries they have become accustomed to. But, make sure you hurry back (with a knot in your stomach), because if your late, there are tons of people watching and judging you, waiting for you to slip up, so they can swoop in and attack.
Those nice adults you get to leave the house and go work with are really worse than children. They watch their clocks to make sure you have arrived early. They don’t care that the car pool line at school was backed up because some stay at home mom who has nowhere to go after she drops off her child is not rushing and has now decided that she is going to load her child’s back pack, give them one more kiss and then chat it up with the teacher who is helping her child out of the car.
You walk into work, and they judge what you have on. They are disgusted by the your stained suit, because your 1-year old who is sick and has a snotty nose and truly just needs their mama, snuggled on your shoulder before you put them down and left them with the nanny/babysitter as you ran out the door.
Then your boss calls a last minute conference call at 5:00, which foils your plans to leave early. Why leave early? To take little Johnny to his T-ball game and pay attention to your child stammer to hit the ball, without a cell phone attached to your face.
You are right, you don’t have to worry about having patience and losing your cool with the little ones at home. Because you are worried about having patience and losing your cool with everything and everyone at work, so you don’t lose your cool and lose your job and leave your family without an income.
But wait, when you rush home, and step your foot in the door, everyone is excited to see you and they run screaming at the top of their lungs, “mommy” and jump in your arms and they all start speaking to you at once and want to complain to you and tell you about how little bobby hit him and the nanny wouldn’t give him a cupcake. They hang on you like leaches, but you have to rush and get dinner ready and check homework and clean up the mess everyone made while you were having all that stress-free fun with other adults at your work. You feel guilty for not being home with them and don’t want to lose your cool because you are so overwhelmed and you want to cry, on 12 minute intervals, but can’t, because you are supposed to keep it all together at work and at home.
Oh, and by the way, sometimes you SHIT your pants, because you were still the one that pushed out those babies and when that baby came out of your Cha-Cha, it messed up your bowels. But the difference is you had to go back to work. You had to put on that nice suit and when the stress of leaving your new born baby at home and the stress of deadlines and expectations at work get your stomach all rumbly, you can’t throw down your yoga pants and run to the privacy of your commode. You have to find a public bathroom to let loose and sometimes you don’t make it. Now, you have shit your suit and need to go home and take a sick day, which will F-up that family vacation you had planned, where you thought you could possibly relax.
So, enjoy your challenge SCARY MOMMY and let me know, which situation sounds more SCARY?
*Personally, I don’t think either situation is easy. I give stay at home moms a lot of credit, because I know that the times that I have been home with my boys have been easy. However, to compare one to the other and generalize is absolutely ridiculous. This is my rebuttal to the Scary Mommy blog: The Stay at Home Mom Challenge.